Welcome to  Burkhard Works. Logical Analysis Leading to  a Leap of Faith. Portfolio & TV Reels. The fastest way to the wallet is through the brain The  Complete Works of Burkhard Nine  Brand Turnarounds Peter A.  Burkhard.  Writer. Producer. Creative Ingenious Welcome to Burkhard Works

(407) 895-3092  peter@burkhardworks.com

The Fastest Route to the Wallet is Through the Brain.

If this is your first radio campaign, click here for basic mechanics & costs.


Are you Keyword Searching for a writer who can whomp up some fast Radio Copy you can send to that throaty basso profundo  Announcer at your favorite local station?  You know, the same guy who Power-Reads everybody else's Bullet Points?



May I suggest you click back to Goo-Hoo?  What you hear here will needlessly distress your checkbook.


On second thought...Turn on your speakers: 

Stinky Dog IV :30
Forrest P Is On Vibrate :60
S-O-C-K-S :30
The Lincoln Dinner? :60
Play the Palace :60

Stay tuned for an hour's worth of similar stand-outs...

Your best prospects know very little about your company.

They are smart enough, though, to filter out all advertising - including yours - that fails to address their personal problems, desires, hopes, and fears.

That filtering process occurs in the Brain, to which radio grants you fleeting access via the Ear.

Music Radio dampens the noise and eerie silence of the Real World.  People hear it, but don't really listen. Brand advertisers and retailers who use Music Radio have to Thud! the Brain into submission.

Talk Radio reduces the complexities of the Real World to the bromides of experts, pundits, and their guests.  People listen. Direct Response advertisers who use Talk Radio have to engage the brain in conversation.

The path from input to strategy to execution to media buy to airing to toting up sales is actually fairly simple.

Just make your prospects' problems, desires, hopes and fears the heroes of your ads.  Forget the bullet points.  They rarely hit anyone's brain, except yours.






I am the only human in America who conceives, writes, produces, voices, plans, places, and tracks the results of Network Radio Advertising.

Whoami?  Click to find out.

Hundreds of humans do one or more of those tasks.  I do them all.

I work exclusively for clients who want to beat out the conventional creative and media buys run by their Much Larger Competitors.

To do so, I make everything by hand, from initial positioning strategy to local affiliate tests to sales tracking spreadsheets to Year II, III... campaign pool-outs.

[Caveats: I have no off-the-shelf Magic Wand Silver Bullets you can load into your local Rock stations.  I do not broker Remnant or Per Inquiry radio.  I rarely submit the Low Bid on anything.]

I use this page to post current and recent campaigns, along with a few hoary gems from the past.  Most are in MP3 or WMA format.

If you'd like to learn HOW I get from your input to strategy to concept to toting up sales results...


"Logical Analysis Leading to a Leap of Faith" - the basic Creative Work Plan


...kindly click to the Advanced Concepts Index Page:


A score of articles on media, creative & production techniques.


Then do what you want your own prospects to do.

Pick up the phone.

(407) 895-3092.





WHAT'S NEW?

Seven Dinovite :30s debuted on ABC Reach and CBS News Network, December 2007. The complete campaign is in the right column. These two  summarize the Extreme Customer Problem and the brand solution.

Vets III :30
Enzymes II :30

The Entrepreneur Authority of Pittsburgh matches up 120 national franchises with prospective owner-operators and investors.  Charles Showalter's first introductory seminars feature Rich Pittius, who has 15 franchises to move.  Saddle up!

EAP Intro
Investors
1800905GEEK.




Red Chip Research ran a Small Cap Investors Conference at the Hilton in New York in mid-August and needed 400 guests.  We ran on WCBS-AM for three weeks. About 1,600 people showed up.  Home page hits doubled, too.  

Innofone
BioScience
Left Behind Games
NewTek
TecheBank

Real People Radio commercials compress several hours of phone interviews into testimonials that sound like they're part of the program on which they run.  (Here's how I make them.)





Thousands of people with stinky, scratchy, shedding dogs spend thousands of dollars on vet bills - until they hear about Dinovite.  This pay-as-you-go, click-to DR Radio campaign increased weekly revenues from $5K to $180K in 19 months.  Play the "Stinky" spots to get a sense of the campaign. Details.

Year I - Jan 06

Stinky I :60
Healthy :60
Bumper :60

Year II - Apr 07

Stinky II :60
Jake :60
Molly :60
Scratch :60
Hair :60
Timothy :60
Zeilha :60
Brutus :60
Olive :60
Vets :60
Enzymes :60

MUSIC - Oct 07

Stinky III :60
Misery :60
Vets II :60
Hairballs :60

Year III - Dec 07

Stinky IV :30
Happy :30
Hair :30
Energy :30
Vets III :30
Enzymes II :30
Chew :30





I opened Dice.com's 18-month, 22-market, 5-network campaign with straight VO spots then switched to Real People interviews at just the right time.  Here are four intro VO spots followed by a few of the 40+ testimonials that propelled Dice from $14 to $40MM in revenues.  (These are all wma files.)

Atlanta Intro
Job Deluge Denver
Job Search Boston
Announce Availability Seattle

Forrest P is on Vibrate
Olivia v The Pharaohs
Chris P Lands at Cisco
Monica D Got 150 Offers
John B's Cell Phone Bill
These Girls Are Geeks
Luke & Meg On Top
Chris S Doubles his Pay
What Are the Hot IT Trends?
Josette adds PMI to MSCE
Meg Flies to NYC
Ralph P Recruits in Chi
Jack K Recruits in Iselin NJ
These PMs Use Dice Daily

“It looks like you put 128,000 extra IT pros into jobs.  I think that earned recruiters about a billion in commissions.”

Jeff Dickey-Chasins
Marketing Director
DICE.COM
Des Moines, Iowa






Testimonials can make the phone ring or drive shoppers to your store.   Note the different mix techniques for the 1-800 and retail versions of the same copy.

Sherrie H (Afluxx)
Sherrie H (V-Lean)
Andy F (Afluxx)
Andy F (V-Lean)



Need roofing, siding, or a new AC?  Why stumble through the Yellow Pages?  1800QUALITY.com will get you fast reliable bids from vetted local contractors.  Or call 1-800-Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y.

Quality Gush
New HVAC
Pizza
Farmhouse
Katrina



...and to pay for all that 1800Quality, you may need some emergency cash. This click-to 1-800 campaign inserts a reminder fusillade into a slate of one-on-ones.

Barbara
Mario
Marcia
Solutions






The Whitney Education Group uses late night TV infomercials to promote free seminars on real estate investment. Real People Radio delivered hundreds of extra attendees.  First we get phone and click-to reservations...

Chicago Intro
Michael Quit Work
Melissa's Worth $3.5MM
Steven's First Deal!

...then we remind you to Show Up!

Show Up Monday
Show Up Tuesday
Show Up Wednesday
Show Up Thursday

These Show Up spots for Whitney's Cash Flow Generator brand ran only during game week.  I cut them from infomercial testimonial clips and in-studio recordings of the Rice Brothers themselves.

Starts Tomorrow!
Go Today!
Second Chance...
Last Chance.

“After our first week on The Radio Show, 85 extra people walked into the Miami seminars without even calling the 800 number to register. That never happened before - in 10 years of infomercials.”

Valerie Gaines
Marketing Director
Whitney Education Group
Cape Coral, Florida



BeHeardToday.com invites you to write letters to your Congressmen, Senators, Governors, the President... which the site will address, print and deliver by mail.  A natural Talk Radio service!  Intro on Laura Ingraham, April 2008.  (I had some ideas on the site design, too.)

BHT-Intro :60
BHT-Intro :30





Demo Radio shows the brain how something works.  Virtual TV - without the production expense.





National Dynamics had run the same network :30 for nine years, averaging 2,000 calls a week and 22% conversion. After several attempts to Beat The Control, I ran an informal Brand Resistance Survey among the TMs.  That led to this rather famous demo campaign:

S-O-C-K-S!
See A Loose Light?
What Time Is It?
I'm So Sorry.
I See A Key Here!
Cool Cervesa.

(The last spot ran once, during the broadcast of a Bob Dylan Farewell Concert.)

“Well, we got 5,000 calls the first week, and conversion is up to 28%.  What the hell did you do?"

Jim McAlister
President
National Dynamics Speed Tapes
San Diego, California





Twenty or so articles on
How Things Work.





If you want a Big National Agency sound and have the budget, we can hire the finest jingle, performance and production talent in NYC or LA.  Or duplicate the sound here in Orlando for a fraction of the price.

Choose Your Partners Well
  (Aetna Partners NHP)

Work Work Work - Play Play
  (Carnival Crystal Palace)

You Wanna Eat Dinner in that Lincoln?
  (Budget & American Express)

It's So Easy to Move Your Stuff
  (Budget Rent a Truck)

Radio Tonga? Radio Moscow?
  (Grundig Radios)

89 Cent Egg McMuffin (3 x :30)
  (McDonald's VA/MD Co-op)

"See it On CV" Intro
  (Time Warner Cable)

Dialogue or Dialectic?
  (Verbal Advantage)

You Love Me. You Want Me.
  (Cigarrest)

Ooo! Grout Grunge - Yum!
  (Citrus Miracle Cleaner)

We Want to Buy Your House!
  (National Home Buyers)

Good Times
More Good Times
Lunch Time
  (Nuzymes)

Pundits judge pols on their words; voters on their delivery. Alan Grayson, '06 candidate for US Congress, was pretty good at both. The Complete Campaign

Intro :60
On Iraq :60
On PACs :60
Gracias :60
War Profiteers :30
Stop the Insanity :30
The Beard :30
On Aging :30
On The Budget :30
Inmigrantes :30








(407) 895-3092  peter@burkhardworks.com



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Updated 11/25/07 © Peter A. Burkhard

Peter Burkhard's Radio Show features radio advertising, radio commercials, direct response marketing, direct response advertising, radio station advertising, radio advertising costs, advertising on radio, advertising radio, commercials for radio, direct response radio, advertising jingles, radio commercial production, direct marketing solutions, radio ads, strategic consulting, radio jingles, commercial jingles, advertising on radio, radio strategy, radio marketing.  This paragraph also brazenly demonstrates a low cost SEOPS alternative to PPC & Overture.  Proof: You're reading it.